Paleo Southwest Meatloaf

Holy balls. I can barely walk today. I did pistols the other day. No I didn't shoot things, I did one legged squats. Guns kinda scare me. But seriously, if you want your ass to feel like someone literally took a slab of muscle out of your donk, used a tenderizer on it, then put it back in your pistols. That doesn't sound fun? Well, if my ass hurts this bad (especially considering it's size), there has to be some kind of muscle gains from this movement, right? My hopes are that my butt is going to look like gold starting tomorrow. I'm going to look in the mirror and it's just going to bounce back at me. That didn't make sense. But you know what I mean. Probably not.

As I've become more and more into CrossFit over this year and a half, I've noticed I look at guys butts more often. I used to never notice that sh*t. Nor did I notice the size of their calves. Now I always look at both. I feel like a guy. But butt size and calf size often say a lot about a man's workout routine. In turn, it says a lot of their personality. You see, I hang around some pretty good looking guys, with great calves AND butts, so I'm often judgmental with other guys I meet. Do I sound like a b*tch? Totally do. But that's besides the point. I just like a great butt, ok?

Speaking of beef cakes, I love meatloaf. So it was about time to make a new meatloaf recipe. Meat in loaf form just makes more sense. And seems to be more fun to eat. It really makes no sense but it does in my mind. But you all have seen what my mind is capable of. I just love ground meat. I plan on making a new chili recipe every day next week. I'm gonna have a balls ton of food at my house. You excited? Me too. Wanna come over and have a dinner date?? See you soon.

By the way, I'm sitting on a lacrosse ball at a coffee shop right now. Inappropriate? Maybe to some. To me it means some newly flexibly hamstrings so I can walk again. K bye.

What you need:
  • 1.5 lbs ground beef
  • 1 egg, whisked
  • 3/4 cup almond flour
  • 1 green pepper, chopped
  • 1 red pepper, chopped
  • 1 red onion, chopped
  • 1 garlic clove, minced
  • 2 tablespoons hot sauce (I used Cholula)
  • 1 tablespoon chili powder
  • 1 teaspoon smoked paprika
  • 1 teaspoon cumin
  • 1/2 teaspoon salt
  • 1/4 teaspoon pepper
  • 1 tablespoon fat (I used olive oil)
What you do:
  1. Preheat your oven to 400 degrees.
  2. Heat a large skillet under medium-high heat, add fat and minced garlic to the oil. Once the garlic has become fragrant, add your green pepper, red pepper, and onions.
  3. Cook until onions are translucent then remove from heat.
  4. Add your meat, egg, almond flour, spices, hot sauce, and cooked veggies to a large bowl. Mix together.
  5. Place meat mixture in two bread loaf pans (at least they're useful for something) and pat down.
  6. Cook for 30-35 minutes.
  7. Top with guac!! Consume
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