Paleo Sweet Potato Pilaf

Holy sh*t. Did you know it's almost Christmas?! YOU DID?! And you didn't even say anything??? You're an asshole. How am I suppose to remember sh*t like this? Ok, don't get your panties in a twist for me referring to Christmas as sh*t. It's a play on words. I don't even know what I'm saying. What I am trying to get at though is I need to start making my Christmas list. And by Xmas list, I mean the list of people I'm going to purchase for. I might as well just invest in one SMALL sticky note since I don't purchase for many people. My list will most likely include four people. Four effing-blow-your-mind-out-of-this-world awesome people, to be exact. I don't know what the hell I'm going to get them though. As soon as I try to start thinking of something I can get them, I automatically think about kitchen utensils. How selfish is that!? I literally consider getting THEM gifts that I would want. My god. I'm such an only child.

Every Christmas is different year to year in my household. We used to have a routine, then I aged a bit and screwed up that routine. Some years I would have a boyfriend that I just HAD to spend time with on Christmas day. Or I would have a best friend that I couldn't spend a second away from. In conclusion, I was a raging b*tch during my adolescent/teenage/adult.up.to.the.age.of.20 years old. I was just so annoying. And selfish. Well, I'm still good at the selfish. I'm just not good with sharing my food. Especially sweet potato fries.

So this year my parents and I are heading to Dallas to visit the fam. You know what that means? Lots of candied nuts. I have no idea why but bags of them just start flowing at my grandparents house. They must secretly know my vice. And my granddad has a chocolate basket next to his chair in the living room. A legit chocolate BASKET. There is more candy and cookies in that basket then I have headbands in my purse. It's unreal. I'm never leaving that chair.

No, but on a serious note, the most important part of this trip is going to be me checking out some Dallas CrossFit gyms. I'm sooooo excited to go to gyms in different states. Meeting good looking people in other areas is just smart. And makes my time spent on Facebook even more thrilling. Everybody loves an attractive new friend on the good ole FB.


What you need:
  • 3-4 strips bacon (or more, really), diced
  • 1 head cauliflower, riced (don't worry, we'll go over it)
  • 1 sweet potato, chopped
  • 2 garlic cloves, minced
  • 1/2 cup chicken broth
  • 1 teaspoon garlic powder
  • 1/2 teaspoon salt
  • 1/4 teaspoon pepper 
What you do:
  1. Heat up a medium saucepan under medium heat, add your diced bacon and let that start to cook down and release the fat. 
  2. While the bacon cooks, cut your cauliflower into smaller florets, place in a bowl and put in the microwave for 2 minutes to help soften it up.
  3. Once the cauliflower is done cookin, add it to your food processor. I used my shredding attachment but you can always use a regular blade as well. Shred those heads!
  4. Now once your bacon is done cooking, remove it from the pan with a slotted spoon and place the pieces on a paper towel. Try not eating it, just try. I failed miserably.
  5. First toss in your minced garlic to the bacon fat saucepan, then add your riced cauliflower and mix to combine it all. Now add your sweet potatoes as well. Mix to combine.
  6. Pour in your chicken broth and spices and mix to thoroughly combine. 
  7. Let simmer for about 6-10 minutes or until cauliflower AND sweet potato are tender.
  8. Add extra (if there is any left) bacon on top.


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